Saturday, December 11, 2010

Bittersweet

Hi Sweet Girl~

It's been five months since you left us to be with Jesus. We miss you the same each day. Christmas will be here before we know it. We hung your stocking between ours and put up a little tree in your room so it would shine out your window. Mommy decorated it with silver and white ribbons and shimmery ornaments. A big silver bow and star on top makes the tree perfect for you. In some ways it makes us feel closer to you. Tomorrow we will bring you a little tree for your spot. It's extra special because it's the same little tree your Great Grandma Judy made for your cousin Bobby Jack and Great Grandpa's spots at the cemetery. After nearly 20 Christmas's, she said it was time to pass it on to you.

This week we learned you are getting a little sister. In many ways we are so excited to see how this sweet girl will be so much like you. We wonder will she have your pretty blue eyes or your chunky thighs? Will she have your laugh or your outgoing personality? Will she love to dance and talk and cuddle with bears? Will she wave like Ms. America as we walk the grocery aisles? Will she twirl her hair as she falls asleep and race to push the button on her glow worm just one more time? Will she get mad and stomp her feet when her Mommy and Daddy hug on each other? Will she love bubbles and babies and outside? Will she sleep well and love us the ways you did?

We hope that a little piece of you is part of her. More importantly, we hope we can show her just how special her big sis was to so many.

It's hard to believe how life has changed since this time last year. Who would ever think we could experience the best of life and the worst of life all in one year? With God's help we try to stay focused on all that we were blessed to have with you, not just what we're missing.

We hope you know how much we love and miss you sweet girl.

Love you...

Thursday, November 11, 2010

Sweet girl,

Just like every morning, you were the first thing on Mommy and Daddy's mind. Today is your day - the 11th. It was always special before and is extra special in its own way now that you're no longer here with us. You would be 21 months old today.

Today was the perfect day - sunny and especially warm for November. It would have been the perfect kind of day to spend with you outside.

Outside...your favorite place to be. You would stand at the big sliding glass doors in the kitchen, smack your hands and say, "Si-Si!". You also loved to swing and slide. You loved to walk on the deck and look through the rails down at Daddy working in the yard. Daddy remembers the time when you were sitting next to the flowerbed and a whole slew of little yellow butterflies flew up all around you. Your big blue eyes lit up with excitement at the sight.

Another of your very favorites with Daddy and outside was wagon rides. You loved being pulled around the yard, giggling, laughing, and bouncing on your bottom the whole way. But the highlight of the ride was when Daddy would get in with you at the top of the big hill and fly down to the bottom over and over again. Your smile and laughter was so contagious.

Now, in our backyard close to the big hill, is a waterfall and garden made just for you. It's amazing how God works His goodness through complete strangers. Mommy and Daddy thought a little pond would be a good way to spend time remembering you. Who would have thought that our little idea would be turned into such a powerful project? So many good people gave of their time, resources, and talents to give Mommy and Daddy this special garden. Nature's Expressions created the most amazing place for us to spend time with you, our sweet girl.

We miss you every day and wish so much that you could be here to see the fish swim and splash your feet in the water.

Love you baby girl.

Monday, October 11, 2010

Looking Ahead...

Today we started our day with a visit to your spot. It's hard to believe that it has been three months since we last held you in our arms. Today you would have been 20 months old.

Everyday brings a little more hope. Everyday things remind us of you. Sometimes those things bring us joy, but often they make us a little sad. Here are a few that come to mind...

Bananas. . . You LOVED bananas. When we would grocery shop I would have to hide them from you. You were so cute! If you spotted them you would fuss for one. When I would hold you in the kitchen you would spot them in the fruit basket. You would get so excited, flap your arms and legs, say "Be-be" and point right at them.

I remember our last day together when we went shopping for fabric for Mommy's classroom we shared a banana on our way into the Hobby Lobby. You didn't mind that it was a little bruised from being in our bag.

Mommy still buys bananas almost every week at the grocery. Most times they rot before they get eaten. One day they will taste sweet again.

Hide -n- Seek . . . You loved to try to find Mommy and Daddy. When you were a little smaller Mommy would hold you in her arms and we would hide together. Daddy would sneak up from behind and make us all laugh.

When you were big enough to walk and run, Mommy would say "Ready - Set - Hide!" and run to the opposite wall of the room. You would walk all around until you found me. I would scoop you up and tickle you all over until you wanted to play again. We miss hide-n-seek.

Big Teddy Bears. . . You got your big brown bear from Santa on your first Christmas. Who would have ever thought that would be your only Christmas with us. Around spring you really started to embrace his big eyes and cuddly body. You would run over to him and lay down in his lap. When it would be quiet in the house Mommy and Daddy would find you sitting with him with a book in your hand.

At the Fayatte Mall in Lexington on our last day together I remember how sweet you looked when you saw the giant plastic teddy bear in the playland. With big eyes you looked up at him and grabbed him with your arms opened wide. Your smile was priceless. It was like you had been reunited with your long lost buddy. The best part was when you turned around, sat down right in his lap, put your arms up over your head and laid back on him. You looked up at him just like you did with your big bear at home.

At night you, me, and Daddy would lay together in your bear's lap to read our bedtime stories and say our prayers. With you Precious Moments angel in our lap we would fold your hands in ours and listen to the little boy's voice say "Now I lay me down to sleep. I pray my Lord my soul to keep. May the angels watch me through the night and keep me in their precious sight." Then we would all say "A-MEN". Mommy and Daddy loved being with you in that special place.

Your bear still lays in the same place beside your crib next to the window. His head tilts in such a way that makes him look a bit sad. Perhaps he misses the attention he use to get. We wonder what kind of bears you're cuddling with up there.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

In the days ahead we have a lot to look forward to. We confirmed today that in May 2011 you will be a big sister. The news is bittersweet for us. Mommy would love to dress you up in a "Big Sister" t-shirt and parade you around to help spread the news, but that cannot happen. In some ways we know we will see part of you in this new life. We look forward to that so much. We hope you and God picked out a good one for us. :0) We realize life will never be as fully joyful as it once was - there will always be a part that is missing. We sure hope we can find a little piece of that joy again.

Although your time with us was short, your impact on our lives continues to be huge. It's amazing to think that just 16 months with you could teach us so much. Even in your passing we have learned the importance of faith and love, the value of family and friends, and the significance of each of our purposes here on this earth.

We sure miss you sweet girl
.

Sunday, September 12, 2010

Missing you...

Everyday we think about you, our sweet girl. We miss you so much. When we are out and see other little girls about your age we try to find parts of you in them. Today we heard squeaky shoes at the apple orchard. We miss that sound.

Daddy visits you almost everyday to water your spot. He works so hard to keep your spot looking nice. He put new grass seed and dirt down where the ground has settled. I made you a new pretty bow. My sweet girl always has to have a pretty bow.

Today you would have been 19 months and one day old. We wonder what new things you would be doing. I wonder how much longer you hair might be and what new words you would know. We wonder what you would have liked about the petting zoo at the apple festival today. Would you like to see the big camel and the little ponies? We know you would have LOVED the wagon ride and the sweet taste of the apple cider.

We miss you sweet girl and love you so very much.

Wednesday, July 28, 2010

Kaden Layne Harris

It's been a month since Kaden left us to be with Jesus in Heaven. We are doing our best to find our new sense of normal and establish a routine for our days. We found it quite difficult in the beginning to wake up to the quiet of our home. The usual static of the baby monitor is replaced with empty air. Our excitement for getting up early in the morning to see our smiling baby girl standing in her crib has been replaced with an uncertain purpose for what we need to accomplish today. We know we will get through this difficult time. Our faith in God and the comfort of friends helps tremendously.

Friday, June 11, 2010

16 Months

Kaden is growing so much. We love seeing her develop into such a sweet little girl. She is curious and loving and as funny as can be. She has developed a personality of her own. She loves playing tag and enjoys the company of friends (little and big) and family. She loves to eat new things, but finds animal "cackas" to be the best. She gives great big hugs and adores books.



Brian and I are constantly amazed at how good she is. We jokingly say that our next child will be rotten by nature.

Monday, May 31, 2010

Dressing







Kaden's Donna Ma was so sweet to make her some sun dresses and outfits. Since she said they were super easy to do, I thought I'd give it a try. Kaden looked so cute!




Friday, May 14, 2010

15 Months and Growing Like Crazy!

Such a big girl! At 15 months, Kaden has become a little person. She has a personality that lights up our lives and makes us laugh like crazy. She is a social butterfly already. She loves little kids and is super eager to make new friends. Anything with a face is waved at (including clocks). "Hi-dy" is her favorite word. Her facial expressions change with every move. Even her "old man look" is something to laugh at. She sure is a funny girl! Kaden loves to slide. The bigger the slide, the better. She loved trying out AJ's big slide at his brithday party. She even went down the BIG slide with Daddy at the park during spring break.

Kaden is officially off and walking! It is so fun to chase her around the house. She has pretty much given up on crawling. I think she realizes that walking gets her there a lot faster...and makes her look more like the big kids!




Saturday, March 27, 2010

On the Go...







Kaden loves to walk! Too bad she won't let go of her walker or your hand. She walked for 20 minutes straight with this determined look on her face. She seems to be a hard worker already! It won't be long before she's walking on her own!

Spring is Here!




Kaden loves to play outside. Brian started taking her on wagon rides around the yard. She thinks it is the best thing ever! She's definitely an outside gal!


Daddy's Birthday!





Kaden loves her buddies Jacob and Lucas.

Monday, March 15, 2010

Tuesday, February 9, 2010

First Birthday Party

Kaden's birthday dress was made by her Donna Ma. Black and white polka dots with a red monogram fit our ladybug theme well. Thanks so much Donna!
This past weekend we invited all our family and friends over to help celebrate Kaden's first birthday. This Thursday will mark one year for our sweet baby girl. We went with a ladybug theme using red, black, pink, and lime green colors. Here is a banner I made with my new Cricut machine.

Instead of giving Kaden a bunch of things for her first birthday we asked our guests to make a donation in Kaden's name to Shriners Children's Hospital in Lexington. Since Kaden was treated there for hip dysplasia we felt we could help do something to give back.

Kaden was super curious about her giant cupcake. At first she delicately touched the top.
Before long she was licking the side.
Finally, she grabbed the whole thing like a bottle and went to town. It was fun to see her get her first taste of something super sweet!







Aunt Sarah and Cousin AJ sent these pretty gerber daisies. They made a great center piece for the big day. The ladybug decoration in the middle was made to go with Kaden's party theme.


We had yummy white cupcakes. I made these cupcake decorations to fit Kaden's ladybug theme.

Marissa, Bailey and lots of Kaden's family helped celebrate. Tatum, Chloe and Anderson were there too!


Kaden loved seeing Elly Kate too. Kaden's other friends Jacob & Lucas, Brandt, Preston, and Grayson were there too!


We had a great time and enjoyed seeing everyone. It meant a lot to us for everyone to come see our sweet girl. Thanks to everybody for making it a fun day!









Sunday, January 10, 2010

First Snow!




















Kaden wasn't quite sure what to think about all the white stuff. We bundled her up until she looked like Ralphie's little bro. When I put her down on the fluffy snow she fell over immediately and started to cry. She watched her cousin Cy and the grown-ups having fun. Brian thought sledding down the driveway might be a new experience. She never smiled, but seemed to be ok with it. Her rosie cheeks and red little nose were too cute. What fun!