Sunday, December 11, 2011


Kaden & Santa December 2009

Layne & Santa December 2011

Hi sweet girl... Another month has passed. You continue to be on our minds and in our hearts throughout every day. As we get ready for another Christmas season, life is bittersweet. We have so very much to be thankful for, yet we still feel incomplete.

Today we celebrated your life and the power of friendship. Your Donna Ma prepared a special gathering to thank many friends and relatives who reached out to all of us over the past year. It was a special afternoon filled with good company and an opportunity to share about you. Your Aunt Alex even made special ornaments with your picture for people to hang on their tree. I love that it was a good day. I love that people haven't forgotten about you. And, I love that people can see our family is okay. It's our special friends and family that have helped us so much.

This time of year we come upon another milestone in this journey of grief. Last year we were completely miserable. Everything festive was piercingly painful. Everything good around us felt like a slap in the face. All we could do is remember what we had and know that it would never be again.

This year is different. Perhaps it's because we have Baby Layne to help make our days brighter. Your baby sister is such a blessing to our entire family. She makes us smile each day and helps remind us of you. She certainly has a personality like no other, but in many ways her mannerisms are just like yours. It's the little things that Mommy appreciates with little Layne. The smell of her hair, the squish of her chunky little thighs, her warm head resting on your shoulder before bed, the pat of her hand on your arm when you hold her. All of these are the things Mommy and Daddy miss so much about you. So when we get these times with Layne we savor them more than we ever knew we should before. In these precious moments with Layne we are reminded of how great it was to have and love you even if only for a short time.

As we venture through each milestone we are reminded just how far we have come in a year. Though we may get more used to living with an empty feeling in our hearts, we will never stop remembering and loving you, our sweet baby girl.